#are always following the one being pursued in a show like the story is shown through their point of view

[jemmo]

ive been trying to think all day why im finding the heart killers so refreshing, and i think ive cracked it. its the pursuit dynamics.

and i don’t think people talk about this enough, bc in an system where we get the same actors coupled together for multiple shows, easily the best way to freshen things up is to change the pursuit dynamics. and the heart killers is a great example of that. i can’t speak a lot for joongdunk bc I haven’t seen their previous stuff in its entirety, but just compared to what i remenber, seeing dunk get to play a character that’s so openly flirty, and being the one to actively pursue feels so new and exciting. and i definitely can speak for firstkhao. in all their shows, it’s been khao’s characater that’s been pursuing and pushing for a relationship, which again makes it so refreshing to now see first’s character be so active in pursing khao’s character. like this switch up in who is the active pursuer, and then how they pursue, and how the other reacts to these advances, these are the things that make it so that we can see the same couple over and over again and still not get bored, bc there’s always a new aspect of them to see and i just think that’s awesome

[proshippers-against-censorship]

hope what i’m bringing up here is appropriate for this blog. i could try finding any other outlet, internal or outside resources that would help me get through this, but i’m trying not to ruffle any feathers.

so, since last year i’ve been watching something i used to be into when i was younger and participating in its fandom. through rewatching it i found out that i shipped two characters that i always had a noticeable affinity towards, except i realized i like the pairing way more as an adult because of everything i missed between them since i last saw the show. they were paired with different characters by the end and even if it was shown to make more “sense” for them according to the greater fandom, i initially didn’t care because of how much i enjoyed their dynamic thoughout the show’s duration. i felt that it brought out a bunch of discussion to be told whether you saw it the lens of a romatic or platonic relationship. most of what happened in the show’s main timeline could not go on without their involvement, and their individual development arcs kicked off because of the undeniable romantic relationship they tried to pursue at one point.

the big thing about their relationship that apparently makes it a “proship”/comship is the huge age difference between them, and unfortunately that’s unfortunately all what the fandom sees them for. i feel that even when talking about the romantic/sexual aspect of them together and the implications, they have one of the least discussed dynamics i’ve seen of many of the major characters, which doesn’t make sense because they’re both the male and female mcs. it’s always “thank god they didnt get together, i’m sick at the thought of them with each other” even though thats beyond what their relationship was like as the story was drawing to a close. one tweet i saw which was a quote of one which showed a screenshot of the characters in the ship i’m talking about in a canonical platonic showing was something along the lines of “the four people who still ship this must be on suicide watch” which is just an awful thing to think of about anyone.

i do try to feel good about shipping them publicly despite all thats been brought towards me for it. or, at least the nothingness of it. a lot of blogs i’ve interacted with and been interested about following in the past through tag scrolling have blocked me for shipping it. i know this because i always notice that a couple blogs who mainly post about the fandom aren’t on my dash. it’s weird, i don’t even like it as a “standard” underage ship. i’m not saying they’re wrong for keeping themselves safe from things they don’t like, it just glooms me out because i still want to interact with much of the fandom, even if we don’t agree on stuff. i’m too old to be spiralling over these things and activating the sanctification in me i’m trying hard to undo to enjoy my hobbies. why does it even matter to me this much that people block me because they don’t like shit i create or post

with this i feel like anti culture absolutely neuters any kind of intellectual discussion about characters who were in a “problematic” relationship and gone out of it to be part of a standard platonic one. i don’t how unique it is for this ship, but i do imagine that people look into the bad things about it far too much. and hey, one man’s trash is another man’s treasure

(i’m being vague to protect myself from antis who might find me out and send me dumb shit, forgive me)

No, no, you're very right. The rise of anti culture has definitely led to a decrease in having decent, intellectual conversations about pairings in media and how the relationships between characters shift in ways that display incredibly important aspects of their stories.

But that ties back to the loss of media literacy, I fear.

[grellestie]

I have heard the worst take and I need somewhere to talk about it and my Grelle Centered Tumblr is probably the best place for it. 

The take was;

“Grelle is a flat character.”

I should preface this by saying that flat characters aren’t bad one bit! They’re needed for a story to work, actually. I do like some flat characters and it’s fun to think about them. Grelle just isn’t one of them since she just isn’t.

I would have agreed with this take if we were just talking about the anime on a surface level but this is just… not correct? Thinking about it, it could be debated that the anime did make her a flat character but I’ll discuss it later.  

She is definitely more fleshed out and, while she doesn't have a lot of screen-time, a lot of her body language says enough. She heavily follows "show dont tell" which definitely leaves a lot of her to be confusing but it's kind of the point. The series is told with ciel as the protag and he's not exactly trying to understand why she is the way she is so the reader learns about her as he does.

But how do we prove she’s not a flat character? 

Here’s a list I found from Literary Devices and I’ll cover how she’s fundamentally not a flat character according to this list as well as another point I saw from a different website. 

The role of flat characters is to support the main character.

“The role of a flat character is to help the main character in pursuing his ambitions and goals.”

Grelle does not do this at all and actually makes the plot progress against Ciel’s favor. She actually tends to ruin the majority of his plans. Her killing of Madam and making it so Jack the Ripper was never caught by Ciel kickstarts the motivation of other characters to notice that Ciel isn’t what he seems. There’s also Book of Atlantic where Grelle attempts to ward off the kid and his pet demon. She doesn’t fit this role so she’s not a flat character here. 

They do not go through a substantial growth or transformation in the course of the narrative.

“… maintains the same characteristics and outlook throughout the narrative.”  

Grelle does not maintain the same characteristics and outlook throughout the manga. However, I've always been on the side that Grelle's development being entirely off-screen was a horrible idea but that’s a post for a later date. Back on topic, she has other personality traits that aren't stereotypical. She's shown to be diligent with her work yet she also has her moments of being reckless in certain moments (I.E. when she was on the Campania and attacked Sebastian believing she had time), and questioning authority which shows her perspective on said authority (I.E. During the Blue Memory arc when she confronted Othello about the council’s plan concerning the bizarre dolls), she's extremely honest while still lying (I.E. She speaks plainly yet there’s always some kind of double-meaning or… lie in what she says, I’d say she showed this enough in her debut), and she seemingly has low empathy which isn't exactly a personality trait but it's still notable since it is a part of her. There's also the showing of how she could be feeling guilty about Madam's death with the coat as well as that scene with Undertaker. And the inclusion of how reapers are created which can lead to conclusions that Grelle aint the happiest individual like she appears to be or that something happened. While you could argue that her growth shouldn’t count because it was due to criticism rather than something happening but I’d argue that it does count despite it being a little on the lazy end. 

It’s a little hard to figure it out considering that a lot of her personality is through implications but that doesn’t mean she has little personality. She’s as mysterious as death! 

They don’t draw attention away from the important characters.

“A flat character is not necessarily boring, weak, or poorly-written. All it means is that they are one-dimensional and not terribly interesting.”  

Implying Grelle Sutcliff, the first major antagonist of Kuroshitsuji is NOT interesting is a WILD take to me. She is the first other supernatural character we see besides Sebastian (Undertaker doesn't count because he wasn't seen as a reaper yet by the cast), she literally offs the main character's family member (in FRONT of him, no less). There's also Book of Atlantic with that being her big reprise and, while she wasn't a main force in that arc, she was still important with dealing with Undertaker and her non-inclusion would have changed certain parts of the story. While you may not personally find her interesting, she makes an extreme impact on the narrative and she has taken away Ciel’s spotlight for such a long time which would mean that she’s interesting to the audience overall and definitely draws attention away from the “important characters”. 

They have recognizable characteristics that make them appear stereotypical.

I have been going back and forth on this one for a while. Whether we like it or not, Grelle was a stereotype and a harmful one at that. She has seriously grown over the story to be a lot less horrible but I can’t exactly blame someone who reads her debut and thinks she doesn’t have much to offer. She doesn’t have too much personality outside of stereotypes and that’s what holds her back from not being a flat character in the anime. 

However, as I mentioned before, she has grown and she has more of a personality and some of them are not recognizable on your first read through the story. A surface level read of her isn’t exactly doing her character justice and that’s what the anime did. Flanderizing her (and other characters to their core). So, to say this, Anime Grelle and Manga/Canon Grelle are NOT comparable, they’re entirely different people therefore, Canon Grelle is not a stereotype of herself.

Thinking about this harder, there’s something I thought about. Flat characters, if you were to take them out of the story, would only affect the plot in a minor way and would be an easy fix if you were to rewrite it without them. I tried this with Grelle and a lot of things started to fall flat. First things first, Madam would be alive if we are to believe that Ciel would cover it up, the Red Butler arc would have to be completely rewritten in order to make up for Grelle's absence (which is extremely hard considering the route they took with it and how the bodies were found so close to each other). The reader’s first introduction to reapers would be WAY later in Book of Circus with William but then they wouldn't even really have the need to interact since they wouldn't recognize each other nor would Will really be the main concern here since he tends to stay in his own lane. Then, when the bizarre doll plot happens in Book of Atlantic, our introduction to Undertaker would be extremely unsatisfying. She does impact a LOT of things and taking her out would HEAVILY affect things.

TL;DR

Grelle isn't a flat character. Yes, there are bits to her that can be seen as flat but they aren't the focal point of her character (especially not anymore) therefore she isn't a flat character. She's just a character who needs to be read into rather than expecting answers.

Thanks for hearing me ramble and if you'd like to have a conversation, feel free to slid into my inbox or the replies!

[raine-kai]

Several times now, I have tried to write fics with Third Prince (Ziduan) as related--by blood--to Zisheng or Shaoshang. All of them have ended up taking on some flavor of OT3, which is awkward for me since I didn't intend to stray into pseudo-incest territory, until I have had to find a workaround or scrap them.

I feel like the fact that this keeps happening is testament to how much, no matter how the show tells us that Zisheng and Ziduan are "secretly best friends", once you start unpacking that relationship in enough detail to try to write it, it becomes harder and harder to take it as strictly friendship.

Zisheng is extremely feral. He never masks his feelings. His crush on Shaoshang is self-evident from the moment they meet in episode 1, and once he sees her at the lantern festival in episode 6, the deal is sealed. Every single time that he and Shaoshang are in the same space, Zisheng's entire body is oriented toward her...with the exceptions being times when he's pretending to be scolded by the Emperor, or when he was carrying out his revenge and determined to abandon her (but accepted her help anyway, until they got stranded on that cliff).

Honestly, the number of women on this show who try to attract this man's attention when he just projects zero interest in anybody but Shaoshang—even is known to attack women who pursue him relentlessly—is...pretty astonishing and probably my biggest complaint with the story. 😂 (I feel like the women who want him are there to show us what a desirable man he is for Shaoshang, but...honestly, I think the show works just as well even without that element. That said, I do have a deep appreciation for the way that once we enter the second season, most of the "romantic rivals" are explicitly shown to only be interested in Zisheng because of his power and status.)

But even when it comes to pretending, despite all the lies and secrets, Zisheng doesn't actually lie about his feelings for the people around him--with Ziduan being the one and only exception. The reason why we are told he hates Ling Yi for most of the run of the show is a lie—not only a lie, but in fact Ling Yi's cruel divorce and abandonment of Junhua was probably a blessing for him and Junhua, because this gives them an excuse to not play nice with the man without getting suspicious.

Because Zisheng doesn't really have friends other than Ziduan, we don't really have a template for what their relationship will look like now that it can be out in the open, either. The show gives us not one single scene where they just...talk and interact naturally. Post-reveal, most of their scenes together include the emperor, who is the one leading the conversation. The exception to this is the damsel in distress rescue scene in episodes 55 and 56, where Ziduan panics over the notion that Zisheng will be dumped by Shaoshang again for wasting time saving him, and Zisheng responds by insisting he trusts Shaoshang to handle herself. (I have so many feelings about this, too many to unpack just yet which is why I haven't gif'd it yet.)

Zisheng's closest relationships other than with Shaoshang and Ziduan, are probably the following: A'Fei and A'Qi (his subordinates), Junhua and Uncle Cui (his trauma-sharing family), and the Emperor (his parental figure and sovereign). We see how gentle and caring he is with Junhua, as well as with A'Fei and A'Qi. With Uncle Cui and the Emperor, we see a far less emotive side of him, defiant and decisive and always loyal.

What is fascinating about Zisheng's relationship with Ziduan is that it matches up with none of the other relationships we see. Zisheng is never gentle in the way he handles Ziduan. Zisheng betrays Ziduan at least once to protect Shaoshang. In principle, probably we could look at his relationship to Ziduan as closest to what he shares with the Emperor, if without the same level of deference. But above all, this is the one relationship where Zisheng is able to convince everyone that he dislikes someone that, in fact, he likes very much.

The show doesn't even allow for an interpretation that by choosing to prioritize Shaoshang over that friendship, the friendship fell apart. Even though we don't see the scenes of them together, they clearly spend time together. Ziduan is with Zisheng already when we see him arrive to reunite with the Emperor. Ziduan has kept up to date with the gossip about Zisheng during his exile, and clearly has feelings about it.

The show told us they were secret best friends, so on the surface, it seems like in an AU setting Ziduan could be Zisheng's cousin, or brother, or something. But, ahem, as a person who has tried and failed to do this several times I advise going about it with care, because the more I have written them the less I am able to read it as a fully platonic friendship. Even if it is one-sided on the part of Ziduan—and here I struggle to fully expand my thoughts because I love him so much that it hurts to imagine his devotion to a friend who is entirely indifferent, and maybe only sees him as the most suitable future sovereign—there is an undercurrent of something in the way that Zisheng treats him. Maybe it's the trying to hold at arm's length a friend whose crush on him he doesn't want to unpack. Maybe it's affection of his own that is deeper than he knows what to do with.

For some reason the show couldn't even give us a shot of Zisheng really looking at Ziduan, though there are signs that he is far more at ease when Ziduan is around. The scene in episode 51, where Ziduan comes into the court to reveal the treachery of the Zuo family, for example. Zisheng has not reacted to anybody else the way he reacts to Ziduan's presence. The same goes for the proposal scene in episode 24 and the caning scene in episode 38. Ziduan's presence is part of what allows Zisheng to be as audacious as he is in these scenes--because Ziduan is secretly backing him up, though it doesn't look like this at the time.

Also, before I close out this ramble, I would like to highlight the fact that the only reason Zisheng did anything about the Luo Jitong situation was because it was upsetting Ziduan. He's known she's a problem for years. He's been perfectly happy to ignore her and let her make a fool of herself. But Ziduan gets cranky about it, and instantly Zisheng is drawing the line and making sure Luo Jitong knows it.

Add to this Ziduan's sheer meanness to Shaoshang in the book that reads as jealousy, and you get...a mess.

[real-total-drama-takes]

Damn emmater actually changed to sierrater. Time to follow through with my promise

Reminder before I begin that I don’t condone sierras actions and think the coderra plotline should have just been an obsessive crush with no physical violations of boundaries and consent

The first thing I adore about sierra is her personality. From the moment she’s introduced in the celebrity manhunt special we get to see her intense passion for total drama- she’s gone the extra mile to learn everything she can about total drama and it’s contestants. She’s just so enthusiastic about getting to meet everyone and I quite admire how excited she was to finally pursue her dream of being on the show. She’s a hilarious goofball every time she’s on screen and will always go the extra mile to fight for what she believes is right. Sierra is a MASTER at challenges and can very easily kick the asses (or save the lives of, remember Niagara brawls) of multiple people if that’s what it takes to achieve her goals.

I see a lot of myself in sierra. I’m autistic and headcanon that sierra is the same. She’s not the best with picking up social cues- Cody aside there’s several moments where she doesn’t seem to understand the hidden meaning behind some people’s actions; the “I think I sat in gum” scene being a good example. Theres a *lot* of instances of her stimming in front of the other contestants and she’s shown to be sensitive to loud noises and bright lights too. Idk, there’s just something about sierra that makes me feel so seen when I watch her in the show. I hate how a lot of autism rep is just white men with special interests in trains or some shit; we need more rep of the negative sides of autism where the failure to pick up social cues can cost us important relationships and make us come off as weirdos to other people and I feel like sierra is that rep.

I completely understand why some people are completely turned off by coderra and that’s 100% valid, but to me coderra remains the best ship of the show’s original run. I do not condone Sierra’s actions, but there were multiple coderra moments that I just couldn’t help but laugh really fucking hard at. Coderra has an amazing end to their story as well- there’s just something really sweet about Cody finally coming around and appreciating sierra as being more than just a stalker when she went the extra mile to celebrate his birthday after not even his parents remembered it. Not to mention Cody would literally be *dead* if it weren’t for sierra. She’s not only taken bullets for him both physically and metaphorically, but the girl straight up went underwater while wheelchair bound, pulled a shark up to land and then beat it up until it spit Cody back out (funny how both of my favorite td ships involve one partner saving the other from a shark I’m just now realizing this lmao) anyways, if not for sierra, Cody would have been shark food. Say what you want about sierra Cody fans but your fav would be dead without her.

I’m of the minority that actually enjoyed sierra during all stars. Yes, the cam-Cody arc was stupid but it did give us a few good jokes (“your ears are wrong and so is your face” gets me every time) but most importantly it proved something. Sierra never once stole Cameron’s stuff, forced herself upon him or went into spaces like his cabin without asking. While yes this is the bare minimum it proves that at the very least she’s made an improvement to her behaviors overtime and might actually be getting the help she needs. Character development is always nice to see!

If any of y’all are interested I actually made a slideshow for her appreciation day on the subreddit last year, it’s mostly the same points that I just gave but this is something I’m genuinely proud of https://www.reddit.com/r/Totaldrama/s/o5KCQJ0ltT

TLDR sierra is an amazing character who I feel strongly deserves more love for her positive qualities

-Sierrover (🐈)

[palidan-sheep]

So far I’ve got one legacy run under my belt and a second on the way but with the scrapped featureds of having companions and possible romance options, I wanted through my two cents in on the latter of the two. Ignore any spelling mistakes, it’s 1am and if I do not get this out of my head I will not be able to sleep.

Sometimes I’m glad the game left a lot of personality out of the main characters while also leaving just enough to build upon it. Their speech and actions mainly.

Heads up- ✨Spoilers ahead✨ while I try and remain vague about some important stuff that happens in Sebastian’s and Poppy’s story’s, they still allude and if not give away what happened for the sake of making things make sense. Ready at your own will🫡

My first run was Hufflepuff with my Oc Evelyn Rogers.

Despite being fiercely loyal to those she had befriended and helped, the thought of romancing someone hadn’t occurred to her. She was too focused on her rather abrupt goal of taking down Ranrok and following the keepers footsteps to even entertain the idea of pursuing anything else. 

Despite the playful tongue and sometimes jealous remarks of her Slythieran friend, Sebastian Sallow, she hadn’t thought to form a deeper connection with him, not whilst the weight of the world weighed on her shoulders.

Sebastian could see this and while it hurt him, he knew he was no different. His own search for a cure for Anne often clouded his own ability to live and made him push asides the idea of doing anything else with his life.

At the end of the story, after spells had been cast and beings killed, the two were left feeling rather empty. Their drives of life, their reasons to fight and read and explore were gone.

It was difficult for Evelyn to look Sebastian in the eyes, she often felt like he should’ve been sent away for his crime but she couldn’t help but to think of all the blood on her own hands. The countless goblins and poachers who stood in her way, now nothing but meer ashes and lifeless corpses strewn across the ground.

She was just as guilt as he was.

And at the end of the day, they were the only ones who could ever understand what the other was going through. So perhaps not out of love but the sense of stability, the ability to feel something other then guilt, to have a shoulder to cry on, the two entwined their bloody hands and refused to look back.

Rather depressing, I know. Perhaps it’s not a health reason to get with someone but it’s realistic.

Our character is a 15/16 yo who was thrusted into this world of magic and murder and mayhem. They are alone in understanding what is at stake and those who possessed this power are from other time. So it’s realistic that my Mc would cling onto something who could show the slightest hint or knowing what they were going though.

Legacy has shown us that they aren’t afraid of telling tales with no happy ending for the record, and honestly? Good on them. It makes the game feel more realistic if you can’t save everyone and some things are just out of your reach.

But on my current play though. It’s an entirely different story!

Orian Gwynedd was a rather normal Slythieran. When the keepers thrusted upon him the fact that he was different, he was more powerful then others, it felt like something clicked in him. Whilst not totally power hungry, the thought of being possible the most powerful wizard in the world drove him to pursue the trials and their secrets and take down Ranrok so no one could threaten his power.

And up until Beast’s class, that’s all he cared about.

Then he met Poppy Sweeting.

While Poppy most definitely can her hold own in a fight, Orion felt an overbearing sense of care for the girl. Every waking moment he spent was now divided up between fighting against Ranrok and now worrying and wondering about Poppy.

He was never able to hide his feelings for her, always talking about her and expressing concern over her actions and whereabouts.

The day they busted the dragon fighting ring is a day he’ll never forget. When they stood before the dragon, when their eyes connected, when face with what felt like death, Poppy smiled. She smiled against the face of death and Orion just knew at that very moment, it was sealed.

Unfortunately, Poppy was none the more wiser to Orions infatuation with her. Often chalking up the various gifts and treats Orion gave her as gifts of friendship and mild affection, like a beast allowing their rescuers of harvest their fur or whiskers.

But as time passed, Poppy began to connect the pieces. And it was strange. At first she wanted to kindly let him down, to swayed him off of the idea of the two forming a deeper relationship, terrified that her lack of social skills and human connections would damage what he felt for her.

Thankfully, her adventures and traversing the valley helped her to articulate and work on her social skills and ability to make friends. Something that even Professor Weasley would note.

They two had built up so much trust between each other that it finally felt like the right time to explain one’s life story. How one was attempting to fix all their family’s wrong doings and another was fighting tooth and nail to, now, save the world rather then acquire power.

But despite this it still took some years before Poppy reciprocated the same feeling back to Orion. She had confided to him that while she wanted to get closer to him, she wanted to work on herself first. Orion promised to always be there for her and kept true to his word when she confessed to him, again.

A but more light hearted then the other pair but my first play though I put a lot more of myself into the game and took it very ‘seriously’. So I think some light hearted-ness is need.

Not to mention that when ya talk to Poppy after she runs off in Hogsmead, you’re character can sound so concern for her and Gah, it makes my heart ache. If anything bad happens to Poppy in the future I’ll riot. I mean it.

Can we seriously talk about the confrontation with that dragon at Horntail Hall?!?!? The lion, the witch, the audacity of that bitch to smile like that when that dragon was thinking about eating us?!?!?!? Idc what any of y’all say, she was smiling and honestly I love her for it. Like words cannot describe just how much I want to take her out and go recuse beats and show her the beats on my RoR.

Gah, I love Poppy Sweeting so much and want more content with her.

Anyways~ I plan to do the other two houses, even have characters lined up and ready to go for them but I’d rather do each run one at a time rather then have all 4 active at once. But I don’t think I’ll have much to say about them as the characters aren’t much interested in romance as they are with surviving. Perhaps I’ll reblog this when their runs come up but idk.

Perhaps my Ravenclaw character will have a love-hate relationship with a certain “I hate my family but I’ll use their name.”

Also yes, I’m well aware that both pairs are Hufflepuff and Slytherian. As I’ve said, I’m a Hufflepuff and Sebastian just happen to be my favorite character and when I went as a snaky boi, Poppy seemed to best fit Orion. That’s not to say I didn’t tease the idea of Orion and Sebastian being interested in each other. A jealous Sebastion is a nice bit of ✨spice✨too add into the story.

[cheswirls]

ok i def have decided i need to rewatch the finale to get a good consensus but after browsing the show's tag (granted this is 2 days after the finale aired so i understand the immediate hype has died down and people have had time to digest and criticize the show as a whole) and being met w a lot of long commentary posts instead of content for the finale i wanted to see (gifs, art, etc) i'm gonna attempt to formulate my thoughts in more detail before doing anything else

largely i do not think anyone's criticism matters to me but it was interesting to see the difference in opinion and a lot of the same critical beats i've seen repeated over and over bother me so (this is in no way a response to anyone btw!!!) here's my two cents:

jellyfish can't swim at night was good. i liked it! but there's a difference between good and great, and the same for liking and loving a show. i know that it was very entertaining and i had a lot of fun watching every episode, but i also didn't think about it much until it was saturday again and a new ep was out.

when i wrote that other post-finale thoughts post i had to look up kiui and kimura's names. i had to make sure meru was the correct girl i was thinking of. there's no denying i enjoyed the show, but i also think that joy was limited to when i was watching it. when i get super into an anime, i have no trouble memorizing everyone's names. the character designs in this anime are all unique and creative while still being in the scope of real-world possible. i say this to highlight that no one looked the same and yet i still struggled to remember everyone's given names, and it didn't help that most of the main cast each had a legal and stage name!

the show being Just Good isn't a problem, btw. it was never meant to be ground-breaking or tell this fantastic tale, after all. it's always been a show about teenage girls making music, and that's completely fine! actually, i didn't even look at it thru yuri-tinted glasses until the 5th episode and hadn't considered anything else beyond that at all (re, kiui possibly being nb). i said before that i was a little sad that kano/mahiru never went anywhere, but after soaking in the (limited) opinions of the masses, i changed my mind: i think it's fine.

largely why i think the finale was okay despite being rushed is that it left everything on a good note. i didn't even realize ep12 was the last until the title card, and yea i do think the narrative could've benefited from a 2-cour season or even a 13th episode, but the way things ended wasn't bad by any means. the point (imo) was to establish things getting better and wrapping up what was left uncertain or was at least not good. by 'not good' i mean not happy, etc. the finale certainly did this and i think it was pulled off rather well! but only because this anime is what it is. the story the creators wanted to tell was accomplished, the most important beats were closed out, and all ends well :)

my main takeaway abt all the yuri "bait" is that i've decided that i don't think of it as bait anymore. the anime in full takes place over the last year of high school for these four girls, and it ends with them graduating and getting ready to pursue their own paths in life. it's a happy, uplifting sorta open-ended, and i appreciate that. these four have found themselves and have worked through some of the issues in their lives that were holding them each back. now they have to get out into the world and explore their lives further. it's great! it's great, and i like that it ended this way. there's no need for absolutely everything to get wrapped up because it's not over! as shown with the montage in the very end, things are still moving forward, just beginning.

it's been a bit and i might be misremembering, but i think the kano/mahiru kiss in ep5 was the first kiss for one of them. it was impulsive and they didn't really talk about it, but i don't think it just "went nowhere" because of everything that followed. they're still on really good terms and they went out (i think one of them explicitly used the term 'date' when they did) and at the end i've decided that it's okay that nothing was explicitly defined. that implies to me that they're both figuring out what they want, and it's something either or both of them will have to grow into. there's a vast difference between queer bait and between putting a pin in a thought/idea. it goes along very well with the anime's open ending for me too.

the first two years after i graduated high school were easily the most pivotal years of my life. i learned so much about myself, and it's largely because of the different environment i was in. now that the four main characters are out of that life (even if only free from social stigma by not being highschool age anymore - kano and kiui weren't in school much but it is still something they can put behind them) and have more freedom to be able to do what they want (even if it just means not being trapped in school for 8+ hrs a day) then they will all definitely begin to change as people, more than the show has already expanded upon. and that is so exciting to me!!

another point abt the open-end is that i think from what i've seen, it's that aspect of the finale that's getting criticized. it's fine to not like open-endings! but they are legit forms of storytelling, and it's not "bad writing" to not tie everything in a pretty bow. to me, after watching the finale, the point of it ending the way it did was to highlight that none of the four main characters' stories are over. the vibe of this show was never supposed to be 100% serious and i think "teasing" mahiru and kano's relationship was meant to plant a seed of the possibility in each of their minds. not liking open-endings is not valid criticism for saying the entire show is terrible and the finale was bad. everyone can have their preferences, but the anime was never supposed to be groundbreaking plot-wise or content-wise and i think having a stigma against it in full bc it didn't feature what you wanted it to is stupid and childish. it showed a snapshot (not even a full year!!!!! c'mon now) in the lives of four different people and did a good enough job of navigating all of them in the runtime it got. not every anime has to be 100% conclusive and this is definitely a good example of such.

[redtailarts101]

Since I know barely any people follow this account or know of it I can use it to send an image to my friends that I want hidden but can't even send through links normally because of link previews

Placeholder image to show up in the preview

Okay warning from this point onward there will be some gore shown. I'll leave the actual images below the cut here.

Devil's Train - Andromeda Callistor

[Image ID: A drawing of 3 characters and a train with an overall red tint. The central character is a humanoid looking alien. Her brown hair is in a half-up half-down style, one side with a pigtail and one in a loose bun that appears to be coming undone. The implication is meant to be that she had her hair in buns, and the pigtail was a bun that fully came undone. She has pointy ears, light skin, and lime green eyes, with the same-colored dots beneath them. She looks startled. Her outfit is a black tubetop shirt with the top of it being fishnet. She is also wearing a violet jacket. in the background is a man with gray hair, the same colored skin and eyes as the central character, wearing a backwards shirt that's ripped. His left arm has the top half missing, bone exposed, and his right arm has scratches. His ribcage and spine are exposed, as are his lungs, and his small intestine is visible. He's wearing brown pants. There's also a close up of another character in the background. Only her head and fingertips are visible. She has light skin and auburn hair in a half-up half-down bun, and her eyes are shrouded by shadow. She has green nail polish and a sinister smile on her face. In the foreground is a black old train, lit by red, with yellow windows and the number 666. There's also red text outlined in white that says "Devil's train" in all capitals. The background is a dark red with a lighter shade in the middle. The whole piece has a glitch effect on it, strongest on the central character. End ID.]

Yes I did come up with an unnecessary backstory for the character because I really liked the song why do you ask?

This information is irrelevant for anyone NOT involved in (C.C.C.) L.A.R.P. 2024 but basically the backstory I've come up with is regarding how she'd met Kiera. She was always an experimenter, though her experiments weren't ever within the confines of a science class. Some were dangerous and others unethical. One of her more dangerous (to herself) experiments was a chemical mixing. She was trying to create a psychadelic for herself and others. She didn't have any willing test subjects, so she took the concoction herself. She begin to see and hear things, alright, but it wasn't any of the crazy or "cool" things she anticipated. She saw disturbing things, namely, the ghost of her grandfather who had gone missing years ago. She ran away from home in sheer terror and still saw and heard things. Kiera found her in her delirious state, learned of how she had gotten herself like this, and scolded her, but also told her she needed a safe way to conduct her experiments. She brings up the upcoming space expedition to the planet Earth, and that the goal is to find and study any life on it. Kiera tells Andromeda that she plans to join the expedition, and encourages Andromeda to pursue biology, promising that it she gets accepted into the program, she'll use her connections to land Andie a spot in the program as a scientist and "researcher" (the research being direct experimentation on the life that they find.) Andromeda's captivated. She agrees, excited at the prospect of being able to conduct her experiments on any subject she wants, without repercussions, and without needing to resort to using herself as a guinea pig.

Will this backstory become canon? Maybe. Maybe not. It doesn't have much bearing on the story of the present and is mostly just self indulgent so I can have something to imagine to the song.

[whatgaviiformes]

No worries that it's been done before. It's always fun to revisit. After awhile, not everyone knows where we started. Here's my little story -

I discovered TOS on my own AFTER seeing 2004. As an everything space nerd, Apollo 13 was one of my favorite movies and I followed Bill Paxton's movies on principle because he is- was- will always be remembered as amazing. Thunderbirds was one of those and I distinctly remember thinking - cool premise, I bet the fanfiction is better.

I discovered pretty quickly this Thunderbirds thing was much bigger than I thought. I read a lot, got my hands on TOS Dvds, wrote a little, and the boys and their story became incredibly comforting and inspiring to me more and more. But I will be completely honest about my experience, I found the Fandom of the time a bit clique-y and elitist, being already so well established by the time I rolled around. It became harder to want to stay involved as any influence of 2004 made it so your work wasn't taken as seriously. Or if it lacked enough TOS Canon. Of course, I was younger and a lot of that could've been my perception. I don't blame anyone for it. I've talked about it before, but I don't think it was a great place for me to have continued trying to grow my writing skills into, or to experience and learn more about the show that inspired us. I would've always been writing to try to please instead of giving myself the grace to play with the content we were given and explore who I was as a writer.

It just was the wrong time for me and I know I would've been disappointed. In the end, I removed most stories and left around when I went off to college. This resulted in a 10 year break from fanfiction and writing when I discovered I didn't actually want to pursue creative writing as a career.

At some point in 2017 I did another sweep of my account and cleared out some more old fics. Those I kept - just 3- got a fresh eyes overhaul.

I missed all of TAG as it was released. I remember watching one or two episodes when the show first premiered but something held it back from dragging me in again. I still just think I didn't need it then. I fully believe timing matters. There's a special beauty in finding something when you need it most.

The love of the boys always lingered in the background and it was almost like coming home. As simple as thinking, I wonder what Virgil's been up to lately...

I started reading fic again on and off and in 2021 (seriously just that recent for me) I started trying my hand at writing again. Little things since I was out of practice. I posted Scenes and got a completely different welcome this time. Even though ff.net engagement was lower than ever, I was shown the magic lived here.

Watched TAG, got off my "what happened to their hair!?" high horse, and figured out that it's totally OK to write influenced by TAG, 2004, TOS, and fanon selectively or all at once. Plus... apparently I write AUs so who even cares about where the accuracy is coming from at that point. Is it the Tracy's? Yes, good, checkmark.

AUs have been surprisingly freeing.

I made some friends both within fandom space and expanding beyond just the fandom. I needed that, probably more than I've shared. But remembering how it was for me, how nervous I was to post after lurking, feeling all to uncertain in my contributions and utter lack of faith in my writing, I have always tried to pay it forward in making people feel welcome. I regret that I haven't always succeeded in it.

So I guess the tl;dr is - came for the love of a family, stayed for the friendships.

FishTank still makes the world go round 😉💚💛

Hi Thunderfam!

Hey, so I know this will have been done MANY times before but for us newbies it would be fun to know how everyone got here!

So… I was a super fan of TOS in the 90s, tried and failed to build a Blue Peter Tracy island, pored through every annual and comic I could get my hands on. Saw small section of 2004 film and could not, so when heard there was another reboot I avoided it because I didn’t trust them not to ruin my childhood love.

Got into Nevermoor late last year, discovered tumblr, overlapped with @womble1 on Nevermoor things and followed a rabbit hole into a womble TAG fanfic which made me think… oh, maybe I should give that newfangled series a little look.

Sat down with 8 year old and said “there’s this thing that’s a remake of something I used to like, let’s see if it’s any good”. We were both hooked the moment Thunderbird 2 appeared out of the clouds - we’ve just finished our second run through all 3 seasons - and I realised there is a LOT of Thunderfam content to catch up on on here too which has kept me pretty busy :) at some point I’m planning to revisit TOS.

How did other people end up here?

[transpat]

pat and acting

i didn't think much of pat joining the play first bc it seemed like it was simply a device used to further the plot and end the bet + using kwan&riam's story as a mirror to theirs, but when u go back and rewatch, pat's theatrics haven't begun or festered from around the play. it's always been there, since the beginning, the play only gave him a platform to let that part of his shine. its been there since he was ten and thought of climbing through his rival's window to draw a truce instead of catching him in a silent corridor at school. when he's eighteen and suggests roleplaying to help that fake rival get ideas for a bus stop, and is ridiculously dedicated to his role. when he's twenty-three and pretending to be his lover's rival on his request and convinces his friends in a way even the requester hadn't.

we know pat has a flair for the dramatic from how he asks pran to pretend-punch him when his friends are fighting, when he stages a heroic entrance to save pran by joining the play, from how elated he is about being gifted the staircase confession. it shows in how he lets pran pass by him then grabs his hand in ep 6, in how he pretends to be sick to get a sponge bath from pat in ep 7, how he ropes his friends into scaring pran after he got shot and convinces pran he's badly hurt so he can kiss his cheek.

but it's obv the loudest during the play. he's so happy, so so happy to be on stage, you can tell he enjoys every second of it. like from how cheerful he is when they're closing the play. at this point, things are a mess w their friends and faculties and pran's upset, but in that moment pat can't stop smiling. and when pat told pran he was going to follow in his dad's footsteps and take the family business, ik we all wondered if that's all he's ever wanted, if he'd chose smth else had he been raised differently.

and i think he knows, that if things were different, he would have pursued performing. taking up the play at all wasn't smth he had to do to win pran's heart or the bet, but he does so anyway bc he enjoys it and now he has an excuse to pursue the thing his father wouldn't approve of. when he was scolded by his father, pran wasn't the only reason he didn't drop out of it, he just knew his priorities unlike what his father accused him of. it was acting above rugby (pran above his father). he continued the play for weeks bc it was smth he liked doing, smth he was unwilling to give up. joining the play, prioritizing it over rugby wasn't for pran, that was just an excuse he needed to give himself to choose his own dreams above his father's, bc at this stage pran was the only thing he would readily defy that man for. so using pran as an excuse, thinking of his actions as placing pran's needs first, lessened the guilt of 'rebelling' against his dad by actively going against his wishes even after a warning.

even five years later, we're shown he doesn't like keeping their relationship a secret but when pran asks him to pretend at the reunion, he does so w no complaints. he finds it fun to lie to his parents, he looked like he was enjoying himself thru out the montage. like u could see it in how pran kept smiling pat's way during the reunion bc he couldn't help it, he's seeing his bf in person for the first time in a year, but pat's so dedicated to his role he answers w eyes so fierce and intense, it convinces his friends that even their kids would be enemies.

and i think this is just one of their things now. like how pran dreams of being a musician, but might never be able to do so bc of his mom, he saves his music just for pat, makes pat his only audience, that same way, pat might have enjoyed performance arts if his father allowed him the option of pursuing it, but bc he can't, he saves his drama for pran. pran will entertain his theatrics and lend him the stage for it thru their secret relationship, while pat becomes pran's most devoted fan.

i think its cute that he likes being dramatic but i also think its sad bc he seems to genuinely like acting. and he'd make a great actor. he'd always pick cheesy romances and come home and practice his lines on pran. pran acts like he's sick of it but his heart jumps every single time bc pat never warns him before slipping into character. he'd do the sappiest things then say 'how was my acting? did it make ur heart skip a beat'. pran says no, a bold-faced lie, but pat's hand's on his neck he can feel his pulse. he's insufferably proud of his acting but only w pran and pran alone, bc he loves the effect it has on his bf/husband. he'd be pretty humble otherwise, paying attention to everything he's told by the producers, crew and other cast members. he also loves acting the most around pran, his favorite role is pran's hero. and omg inkpha and the kids would be sick of them. of pat for constantly trying to woo the man he's been w over fifteen years and of pran for pretending he doesn't like it when every inch of him is visibly squealing. also i'm sorry this devolved into hcs fskljfsl if we get s2 i wanna see them explore that bit about pat's ambitions outside of his father's dreams for him. it might not necessarily be acting, i might be wrong, but i just want to see pat learn more about what he likes, outside of what his father has dictated he should.

[gameofthronedd]

It really, genuinely, confuses me how Daemyra shippers think that the showrunners are going to "ruin it". I can understand if these fans haven't read Fire & Blood. But when it comes to those who have... did we read the same book? And, heck, even just based on the show (and pre-existing knowledge of the world GRRM made) I think it's relatively easy to ascertain that they're not going to have a beautiful relationship with a happy ending?

Brief F&B spoilers below.

The idea that the showrunners are going to "ruin" this relationship is strange to me, due to the fact that it was never a fairytale relationship to start with, this is part of the world of ASOIAF and because of what happens in F&B.

The start of their relationship on screen isn't... the ideal start, right? Daemon is her uncle and quite a bit older. He's also shown to be careless & reckless about her safety; he leaves her half-naked and her exposed in a brothel without any to look after her. Then he allows Viserys to believe he had had sex with Rhaenyra. Daemon may love Rhaenyra but he is not caring. Which brings me to my next point... just because he loves her, does not mean that his "love" isn't toxic or harmful.

It's difficult to deny that Daemon loves her. I think most would agree he does. BUT loving someone doesn't always mean that it's healthy. Hence the examples up above and the instance of Daemon choking Rhaenyra. I think Daemon is a good example of someone who has a "charming" or "charismatic" personality, one that can make you forget the violence and darkness he possesses. So, yes, he loves her - but he is also Daemon, and that love isn't always healthy or good.

Like I said, this isn't a fairytale. It's ASOIAF.

Honestly, one of the healthier relationships I can recall of ASOIAF is the one between Cat and Ned. But even that relationship has its issues. They didn't love each other at first. Cat was upset about Jon. And it's not a happy ending. Most other relationships I can remember in ASOIAF have some degree of tragedy or toxicity. F&B is more of the same, and Daemyra is no exception.

In F&B, there's obviously the situation of Daemon & Rhaenyra being seperated for most of the war. Then, Daemon spends most of his time with Nettles, possibly (or likely) pursuing a relationship with her - which leads to R becoming paranoid and wanting Nettles dead. We all know what happens to both Daemon and Rhaenyra.

So honestly I don't know how this relationship can be "ruined" when it's one that implodes on its own. There's no reasonable way to avoid it being "ruined" without messing up the story and the characters.

Obviously, it's not every Daemyra shipper thinking this way. But I have seen it floating around and I have to do a double-take every single time I see someone pre-emptively get mad with the showrunners for "messing up" Daemyra in the future?? I have a few bones to pick with Daemyra & its shippers but by far the weirdest take I've seen is the idea that the showrunners are going to mess it up lmao. They don't need to do anything, really, except follow the general plot of F&B 🤫

[lantsovsupremacist]

I was wondering if you could do a Nikolai fic w a Tidemaker reader who works for him on the Volkvony ?

whenever i read nikolai stuff, i imagine his girl to be a tide maker. so, of course it’s my honor to make this happen 🙏🙏 also i got carried away and there will most certainly be a part 2 🤪🤪

mijn dochter: my daughter (i went with dutch because that’s what kerch is supposedly influenced by)!

nikolai lantsov: mirror ball

it all began out of desperation, as most things in your life often did.

born into a family of ten living on the farmlands of kerch, there were always too many mouths to feed. despite the nature of your family’s occupation, whatever could be harvested or slain for food often ended up sent to the markets to try and keep up with the land payments. it was this necessity to help your family (an expectation of yourself as the middle child as much as your younger siblings) that kept you from attending school the day testing occurred. considered the bottom of the lowest class, nobody deemed you important enough to reschedule a test or even find you a spot for the next year’s round.

you believed the position of the testers. it was not because you felt particularly unimportant, just that there was no history of grisha in your family or few you had ever come into contact with. in fact, watching the older kids get tested was your only example of grisha power. a lack of suitable education did not help your case. so, you disregarded the event or lack thereof quickly after it passed.

however, when you pulled the tide in to help the withering crops survive one summer—out of sheer desperation—you could no longer ignore the possibility. the land only needed to close in to the sound by a few feet in order for the water to saturate the fields properly. it could have been a trick of a weary mind. you might not have even realized what had happened if not for your father’s startled gasp.

he muttered a single word, grisha. anything else was unintelligible under his breath—likely a slew of curses. he had even less of an education than you and your siblings. for months, you pleaded for your parents to pretend as if nothing had changed. your oldest brother knew the word for it: tidemaker. one of his best friend’s at school, their older sister had been one. but, she had been taken away. you could not imagine leaving your fields and the sun that hung above them.

you did not want to be a danger to your family, what with the way in which discovered grisha were treated in kerch’s cities. you could only hide for so long. in addition to this worry, you believed by using this resource, you could find better pay to send home. it was not the second army you desired to join but perhaps, some freelance work.

the volkvony was much larger than the scattered fishing boats dotting the coast. even those you saw rarely, the docks being miles outside your town. the pirateer’s vessel and those occupying it radiated power. the reminder of your own ability did little to ease your anxiety.

you mother’s final parting words rang in your head, and you held onto the echo for as long as you could.

“you are a fierce force to be reckoned with, mijn dochter.”

right now with your knees knocking and shoulders shaking, you hardly felt it. your mother often remarked you showed courage in different ways. you might have paled at standing up to the bully that had broken your sister’s arm as a child and allowed your eldest brother to physically retaliate, but your calm nature quieted her cries as you held her gently, waiting for help. you knew that even when he did not verbally express it, your father still appreciated how you took it upon yourself to care for the little ones, handle the crises at home. you made life work for everybody.

your littlest brother, espen, would think you were strong despite the obvious nerves riddling your form. before you left, he hugged you goodbye with all of the strength his two-year-old body could muster, imbuing you with it. his childlike magic satiated any apprehension that came your way on the voyage to the boat’s docking in ketterdam—a city’s whose reputation limited your visits to three occasions in eighteen years. and when it faded, because it always did, you held tight to baby noa’s fairly like giggles, each one of her accompanied smiles locked carefully away in your heart.

even with living a life largely locked on land, the water brought a unique sense of calm to your restless spirit. to any onlooker, your closed eyes and deep breaths by the banks could be attributed to the anticipation of adventure. however, anyone who truly knew your heart would understand the greater impact of the tides. they might even notice the slight curl of your lip or scrunch of your nose, the actions of concentration supporting the delicate ripples of waves on the edge of the sound.

a voice from behind you nearly caused you to jump right off of the dock. one might think that growing up in a household of ten, you would be painfully aware of your surroundings. that could not be father from the case. you did not intend to walk through life stuck in your own head, but it was a habit.

“we’re boarding now,” the same person spoke again, “you’re our new tidemaker, right?”

“that’s right,” you annunciated softly with a nod of your head.

now having stepped forward, you identified the figure to be a girl a few years your elder. with short cropped hair and a glint in her eyes, she intimidated you. however, her tone was kind and seemed welcoming.

“i’m tamar and that,” she extended a hand to point, “is my brother toyla. heartrenders.”

you nodded again, rolling your lips into your mouth. following behind her, you strung your bag over your shoulder and avoided the more worn planks on the dock. the wood was speckled with age.

“how long have you been in the harbor?” you questioned, genuine curiosity in your words.

“only a few days,” she replied without turning her head, opting to keep her gaze ahead as she weaved through the crowd, “ketterdam intrigues sturmhond, but he never keeps us here for too long.”

recognizing the captain’s name who had graciously offered you a position onboard the volkvolny only two days prior, you continued after tamar. you remembered his crooked jaw and nose that had obviously been broken before. however, the ease of his smile and light in his eyes gave you the push to accept. he had approached you in the spot which you had stood only this morning and caught you in a similar position. he had been uniquely attentive.

the way he revealed that he had caught onto your ability with the ripples in the shallow water still caught you by surprise and perhaps, amusement. he had asked you to help him skip a rock. you smiled at the memory now, a small but authentic one only for yourself.

“are all of the hands grisha?” you asked another question, careful to lower your voice.

home to various brothels, pleasure houses, and gambling dens, as well as gangs, ketterdam could trap grisha in servitude if they were not vigilant. this and the general boisterous nature of the city were largely your reasons for avoiding it. you preferred the tranquility and predictability of the countryside, where all that stood out among the plains were the occasional rolling hill and far away slopes of mountain.

your older brother coen studied in the most acceptable part of the city on a scholarship, the only one of your siblings (including yourself) that showed enough intellectual promise to merit pursuing an education over farm work. the only other member of your family to dare encounter the barrel was lotte. given she was now estranged and likely involved in gang work, her possible presence did little to soothe you.

“oh, no,” tamar answered, “in fact, most aren’t. we try and keep it quiet.”

humming in response, you used the handrail to board the ship. you took a deep breath to quell any remaining anxiety. once your feet touched the hull, there would be no room for fear or at least, any expression of it. you were used to keeping to yourself, your head down and hands working.

the salt air filled your lungs easily, and you were greedy for more. it left a pleasant enough taste in your mouth. you realized you were content here and wondered if you might even find happiness on the ship.

after showing you to the quarters you would share with two other girls, you straightened your cot and placed your bag underneath it. you made quick work of braiding your hair back, pacing the room as you did so. there was work to be done, and you would be sure to see to it.

grounding yourself to steady the spinning of the room, you faced your things one more time and headed out to the deck above. for once, you were surrounded by people like you. while this did not quite give you confidence, there was a semblance of reassurance flickering in your heart.

you no longer needed to be perfect for everyone else. though your family was still largely your responsibility as they would receive a portion of your wages, you no longer had to pace your interactions with each member. if you wanted to, you could be as loud and lively as the rest of the crew surely was. scrunching your nose at the thought, you stepped by an empty crate and up the stairs. you liked being quiet. it gave you the headspace to observe others.

a long life of making the lives of your younger siblings and parents easier gave you little time to think for yourself or about yourself. maybe this adventure was all a farce to finally please yourself, to learn to believe in yourself, but you had forced it to be about the others. always placing the focus away. that was an easier story to believe rather than accepting that maybe, you were doing something for yourself and maybe, that was okay.

perhaps it should have made you nervous, but you were a shy version of excited at the idea of testing out each variant of yourself to see which one you believed in most. you had shown everyone else what they wanted or needed to see for many years. you needed to live for yourself now.

you had a right to the sea and you were determined to take advantage of it.

[sagesparrow394]

FUCK IT IM TALKING ABOUT IT

So basically a few weeks ago I did my own designs of the characters in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and basically created my own version of the story in my head. I also made it genderswapped because why not (the idea of Wonka being a woman would not leave my head, we love chaotic unhinged women) (I'd also recently seen the musical, and the role of Charlie was played by a girl and that stuck with me)

ANYWAY as well as the og story, I got thinking about what the characters’ futures would be like post-tour, especially the kids. Like how would they change themselves and their lives as they grew up, what careers would they pursue? I found it easy for most of them, but I struggled with what exactly I wanted for the future of my version of Violet, Victor Beauregarde

So… I was trying to think of a job and future for Victor, and around the same time I needed a character to be my Stardew farmer. And my brain kinda merged them together and went ‘Victor = farmer???’

And then the more I thought about it, the more I became obsessed

Victor as a kid is a prodigy, goes to a private school, lives in the city with his mother who pushes him to grow up way too fast. He does his best to live up to his mother’s expectations, while clinging onto his gum chewing habit as one of the only ‘childish’ things he can still enjoy - even if his mother tries to discourage it.

Then the tour happens. He’s left with blue skin and a clear instruction to avoid eating blueberries as eating them could cause a ‘relapse’. And his mother is… not at all happy.

He basically spends his whole teen years desperately trying to win back his mother’s favour and prove he’s still the perfect prodigy he always was. His only moments of respite are the regular calls he has with the other tour members - they became friends and keep in contact - and calls to his grandfather. He doesn’t see his grandfather much, the guy lives on a farm in a far away valley, but he has always shown unconditional love to Victor.

Eventually Victor receives a letter from Willow Wonka: she’s found a way to turn him back to a regular colour. It doesn’t completely ‘cure’ him - his hair still has streaks of blue, he still can’t eat blueberries, and when he blushes it’s noticeably more purple than pink - but it’s enough to allow him to live a more normal life. Plus his mother starts treating him a bit better again.

He graduates college, gets a well-paying position working at a law firm and he hates it. But it’s what his mother always wanted for him, so he keeps working.

When he’s 23, his grandfather dies. Victor is distraught, but he gets something interesting at the will reading: an envelope. When he goes home, he opens it, finding inside the deed for his grandfather’s farm.

After a whole year of grieving and evaluating his options, he decides fuck it. He hands in his two-weeks notice, starts packing his stuff, blocks his mother’s number, and moves out of the city, heading to Stardew Valley.

As a farmer, he feels free. No one here knows anything about him aside from the fact his grandfather used to run the farm. They don’t have any high expectations of him. They don’t know what happened in the factory and can’t judge him for it. He gets to build from a completely blank slate.

But the work-ethic and standard of perfection he had forced onto him isn’t completely gone yet. He finds himself desperately trying to prove his usefulness to everyone in town. Any failure to follow through tasks or requests he gets is like a gut-punch.

And then he finds himself getting feelings for the local doctor. And his initial reaction is horror. Even though he's completely cut her out of his life, he can't help but worry what would his mother say if she somehow found out her perfect son liked guys...?

But it is so damn hard not to fall for Harvey, he's so sweet and kind, and shows care and concern without Victor even having to do anything to earn it.

Then there's Harvey, who can't help but find this farmer a very interesting mystery. Victor pretty much never talks about his life before moving to the valley. He's weirdly insistent on never growing blueberries on his farm. When Harvey offers to give him a check up, Victor is noticeably cagey, firmly requesting no blood tests and that Harvey not search out his old medical records 'out of respect for his privacy'. Speaking of blood, Harvey can't help but take notice of the unusual pigment of Victor's blush. The guy seems to blush a lot - at least he does around Harvey...

On top of that, Victor's really smart. And he's a good listener, happily listening to Harvey's infodumps about planes. And he's pretty cute, with his light sandy brown wavy hair, streaked with royal blue, and his bright indigo eyes- Okay, Harvey's definitely falling for him too.

When I want to write a Stardew fic and decide to use one of my many ocs as the farmer, but the oc that fits best ends up being my own genderswapped version of a character from a book I was obsessed with as a child, so now I ship him and Harvey and no one else will understand it but me

[rumblelibrary]

Hello 👀❤️

So... I don't know if this will work or not, but I thought why not, I send it in... And if you don't like it, that's completely fine ❤️🔥

I really like how you write the characters' mind... What they are thinking or how they act... I was thinking, maybe a new mechanic (Reader) at Ferrari (yes, it's a Niki Lauda fic, you know me❤️🔥) who is really shy, but very good at their job, and Niki likes them and he is an asshole with everyone (which is normal from him) EXCEPT with the Reader... And like... Maybe at first he doesn't realize this, but then he does, and gets all conflicted like why is he getting soft suddenly, out of nowhere... (It is obvious, but not for him)... I'm curious how you would see this, write this... The ending of this story is up to you ❤️❤️

Love you ❤️🔥👀

What Is This Feeling [Niki Lauda x Mechanic!Reader]

Word count: 2.5k Warnings: lot of swearing by our favourite Rat King Author’s note: Niki is quickly turning into my comfort character to unleash my sass, thank you for giving me the chance to write him!

Part 2

On your first day at Ferrari nobody took you seriously, but to be a mechanic wasn’t exactly typing letters, it was not a place where somebody high up in the ranks would set a lover to give her some benefit and a free pay check.

You didn’t talk a lot, you stood your ground from the moment you put hands on any part of the car, but you weren’t exactly the chatty type and, being the only woman, it took you time to be allowed to the after work beer, to the birthdays and all the balancing that came with a good team spirit.

In a world full of bias about women, you were spared thanks to your abilities and knowledge. Or maybe, because the mechanics team had someone bigger to fight: Niki Lauda.

To work with him was thrilling, but stressful.

He would walk in at any hour of the day, break some egos, pile up an amount of changes that to make a brand new car would be a faster option.

You sat on the floor beside the baby, yes baby was the car, it wasn’t like you had to stay on the floor, there were more than plenty working stations, but it felt more comfortable for you: it gave you the chance to stand and look at things from afar, you were in need to touch, to understand, to put things together. It was your skill, but also your curse, because it was hard to gain yourself a space on the floor in such a fast paced environment like the one at Ferrari. You were working on the ignition when he stormed inside, the soft chats died fast and the noise of the radio was the only thing left, but he didn’t seem to mind the effect he had on people.

In a couple of long steps he was in front of one of your colleagues.

“What is this?” The man looked down to his sandwich like it was self explanatory, but the following silence brought him to answer “my lunch”

“Nice” Niki said, his lips curling downward in a very sarcastic amusement “well, take your lunch out of my garage because I don’t want your crumbles in my engine” he hissed picking the crumbles that effectively fell on the working table and sprinkling them like salt on the man’s face.

The man frowned and left to eat outside and avoid to punch him as Niki proceeded to his next victim.

“And you call this a design development? I call this dog shit”

“If this is a well done job, I’d better retire already before I get your good job to crack my skull open”

“Just begin again, don’t even ask”

“Are you sure you don’t work for McLaren? Because by the quality of your work I am starting to wonder”

One after the other all your colleagues fell under the axe of Niki’s commentary.

Nobody was spared, it was a butchery.

“So? What is this?”

You looked up at him as he towered over you, Satan himself would be less scary, and probably less attractive, to your eyes. His standing figure with rebel curls and his Ray-ban glasses in his left hand, the polo shirt under the fancy jacket, even his bad character gave him the edge so many men more conventionally attractive lack.

“I am working on the ignition” you said as he bent down crouching beside you as you showed him, his cologne filling your nostrils like the best smell your nose ever encountered.

“Okay, in what way?” He asked resting his elbows on his knees.

You gulped softly “Well, I am trying to experiment if I change this in here” and you pointed to a section in particular “maybe the car will have a better performance at the beginning of the race”

“Have you considered that it could over work the battery?”

“I did, but I wanted to see if I make here something like this” and you took a little tube showing how you lace it around the section “if I use this to push the cooler to work into this part as well, we might avoid over heating”

He listened touching his chin with the edge of his glasses thoughtfully.

“Give it a try”

He just said standing up.

Your colleagues looked at you shaking their heads as he turned around and everybody looked down to their tasks again, so then he left.

______________________________________________________________________ This wasn’t the first time, he wasn’t letting you do things he didn’t approve, but he always listened to you, he advised you, and the harshest thing he said was probably “I think you’re not looking at the bigger picture”

Nobody commented on it and beside some joke here and there, the little preference he had over you seemed to pass unnoticed mostly by him.

“You know, you really need a girlfriend” Clay, the other driver of the Ferrari alongside him, said during some tests.

Niki looked at him.

“Why? Do I look like one that has to fuck a woman to be fine?”

He laughed as Niki was always so overaggressive “No, but you treat everyone like bullshit beside the new girl, so you either can be an asshole only with men or your seduction technique needs a real check”

He frowned, eyebrows furrowing together as his lips parted in disbelief

“You nuts”

“Maybe, but I haven’t heard you complain about her as much as you complain about the rest of the world”

He shook his head “You are just letting you Italian genes getting your head stupid”

Clay laughed at him nodding knowingly “Sure, sure” he patted harshly on Niki’s back knowing how much he hated to be patted around like that as he moved to talk to one of the mechanics working on his car.

Niki crossed his arms resting against the wall of the garage, his eyes instinctively looking for your figure finding you to one of the working table writing down some notes over the changes applied while looking at the projects.

His eyes dropping on your ass like it was the first time he checked it, realising it wasn’t the first time he mentally noted it.

Well, he couldn’t really say you were unattractive, or not his type, or a good mechanic.

His thought process was suddenly interrupted as Clay himself approached you and you moved on side showing him the papers you were just writing on.

He nodded and said something to you, his hand casually resting on the small of your back making Niki’s jaw almost snap for how much he was gritting his teeth.

You shuffled on side avoiding the touch with a casual smile, but Clay kept talking to you and from afar Niki saw him say something and wave his pointed finger between himself and you. You shook your head and smiled turning down whatever he just offered with all the politeness you had, Niki pursued his lips slightly in amusement for his best girl’s behaviour.

Wait a second. Best girl?

He glared at Clay that smirked at him from afar, a big ‘I knew it’ smirk on his lips.

Niki bit the inside of his cheek not liking it.

He was with you like with everybody else, what the hell.

Niki ignored you all day, when you showed him something he himself requested to be shown, he shuffled away, when you handed him something he was looking for, he looked for it somewhere else, he just wasn’t meeting your eyes and hell and thunderstorm fell upon anyone that even tried to engage a talk with him on that day.

“I can’t with your boyfriend anymore, I swear” one of your colleagues muttered to you.

“He is not my boyfriend” 

He looked at you “Then he’d better be soon, maybe he’ll chill out”

“Are you even paid to stand and do nothing?” Niki shouted from afar and you two parted ways faster than two kids smuggling candies during class. ______________________________________________________________________

The next day was the judgment day for all the changes done on the car, your nerves were cracking as Niki arrived in his driving suit and your eyes immediately snapped a mental photo on his figure.

Did you ever went home wishing to have his company? Yes.

Did you ever wondered if he was so aggressive ever in the intimate times? Way too much.

Did you have any chance? Probably no.

You let out a big sigh as your colleagues reassured you “Hey, if it doesn’t work we either get rid of the rat or have some more time to work on it” he joked but you didn’t feel any better.

Niki looked up as he noticed your worried look, your lips nibbling down on your lips, your foot tapping rhythmically and nervously, the sudden instinct to lean his hand on that waist of yours, to rest his leg beside yours to make it stop that nerve wracking dance, to forbid your lips any more damage not caused by him.

All of that crowded his mind and he growled tiredly.

Stupid Clay, with his stupid theories.

He finished getting ready and put on his helmet settling down in his spot rolling his shoulders back, he needed to focus.

The head mechanic came over him repeating all the changes and just annoying the hell out of him, he is not always around the car only to check you out.

“When you're done telling me what I know, tell me something I don’t, I beg you”

The head mechanic did a big effort not to spit into his face and just left him waving his arms in the air.

You touched on your forehead nervously, if you failed it would show in the timings or maybe the car won’t even start.

You looked at him, seconds before he pulled down the dark lid of his helmet, his dark eyes so focused a shiver creeped over you.

You gasped as the signal was given and the car started.

Your fingers finding their way to your mouth as you nibbled your skin.

The car was fast, that was sure, you leaned beside the head mechanic that was taking the time. You breathed heavily, your mind going through all the changes you did, all the small settlements, the little details.

An eternal list that kept repeating itself.

Then the question as he was halfway through the leap, what if you disappointed him?

What if he asked you to be sent away?

Then you looked down to the chronometer, he was already almost two seconds earlier than usual.

A smile started to grow on you, the excitement filling your veins.

The sound of the engine roaring beautifully, you made it!

Then it happened, some smoke raised up to the sky, one of the wheels snapped, the breath died in your throat.

The car flexed on side but Niki controlled it and guided it against the sandy side of the track that slowed it down until it stopped.

“He was breaking his record” the head mechanic sighed “now he is just going to break our balls”

Niki moved out of the car throwing his helmet on the ground pushing off roughly anyone that tried to help him or check if he was hurt, some of the mechanics moving to the tow truck to recollect the car, Niki moving past you, his face tense and his posture of someone ready to snap some necks. You didn’t see him for the rest of the day, nobody talked about him, nobody mentioned anything as the storm will fall on all of the team the next day.

Now it was the head mechanic to face it for all of you.

______________________________________________________________________

That night you stayed over time, the other colleagues told you to just go home, to not let the thing sink of you, to look at it with fresh eyes and all those circumstantial phrases people gift you when they try to cheer you up. 

As always on the floor, you had now the chance to spread the pieces out, collect them into branches of types and use. You pulled closer your notebook writing down the ideas and things to remember to check, the image of Niki almost crashing gutting you even if you soon realised it wasn’t your change that set off the wheel, but it was part of the cause, the car was now too powerful and the stress on the suspensions was deadly.

You yawned lightly pulling a catalogue of replacements parts trying to find the best mix you could manage, but you surely had to make up something about it. You didn’t expect to solve the problem or to find the solution for everything with a creative twist, but to, at least, plan a sequence of possibilities to present to your chief the next day.

A hand slowly leaning a mug of steaming coffee beside you.

You looked up to find Niki there, another cup in his hand, those messy curls calling to be touched, his impeccable style always winning you over with a dark turtleneck and his tweed jacket.

“Found the problem?” He asked sharply as always.

He was surprised to see you there, he spent the rest of the afternoon after the malfunction with the head mechanic and some of the administrators as he needed a solution in time for the upcoming race.

So he decided he couldn’t trust their promises and reassurances, but take the matter in his own hand, for a change. But when he arrived he saw the lights still on and you there. He was almost tempted to leave, it wasn’t a good moment to screw things with one of his most talented mechanics.

But you, again, were so into it, you looked so beautiful with your working jumpsuit and the hair messed up nibbling on that pen like it was a matter of life and death.

He couldn’t just let you stay so beautiful and alone, who knows who could approach you.

You nodded “I think so” you said showing him the piece, he leaned his head on side studying it 

“May I?”

You nodded as he took off his blazer before joining you on the floor, he crossed his legs, your knees touching as he stole those papers from your hand.

“Signal to the administration this night shift, or they won’t ever pay you” he muttered without looking away from the papers.

You smirked “I know, but it is more a matter of principle than money, I didn’t like the heart attack you gave me today”

You were surprised by your own words, maybe it was because you really were over caffeinated or just realising how it was the first time you were alone and how you felt comfortable around him. No, not comfort, it was trust, you trusted him.

He looked up from the papers up at you, he didn’t replied to your comment straightaway, he let it sink in, he let your presence sink in.

A one-sides smirk appeared on his lips

“It is going to be a long night, then” Tagged @cazzyimagines @lieutenantn @handmaiden-of-mischief@thesunflowersutra Let me know if you want to get added <3

[logicalbookthief]

Things Left Unsaid -- An Analysis of Rei & Touya

Apparently Rei has been getting a lot of flack lately, all of it undeserved, and since I had a post analyzing her relationship with Touya in the works already, I figured no time like the present.

Disclaimer #1: There are a lot of issues with the writing for Rei’s character that have nothing to do with her and everything to do with how the storyline is using her, which I will address and examine.

Disclaimer #2: I’m someone who, while always curious as to what kind of relationship Rei had with her oldest son before he died, never thought it would be revealed that Touya was close to his mom. I don’t think you get the Dabi we see in Chapters 290-295 without him being so warped by his relationship with his father yet so dependent on his attention that he was willing to kill his brother and himself simply for his father’s acknowledgement.

But that’s what I find so interesting about Rei and Touya -- it’s a relationship that mainly consists of regrets and things left unsaid. There isn’t the anger or resentment Dabi feels for Endeavor, because that intense level of emotion sprung from the loss of the father who used to be his whole world. His feelings toward his mother seem more amicable, but also more distant.

And while she could’ve done some things differently in regards to her oldest, I want to make it clear that the distance between them was very much by design.

After all, Touya was the end goal of their marriage. It was never any secret as to why Enji wanted to marry her and to some extent Rei must’ve realized that this child was not meant to be hers: the child was the transaction, the thing she was needed to create, to give to her husband. Of course she loved Touya and was likely his primary caregiver for most of his life, but there was no doubt that once his quirk manifested and he could begin his hero training, his life would be dominated by his father. Which is what happened.

Here, I would like to point out something I noticed in the flashback chapters. We never see any panels of Enji alone with any of his children during their infancy -- even with Shouto, the perfect child he longed for, we see Rei holding Shouto, sitting by him as he sleeps. Enji is there tangentially. Once Shouto begins his training, that is when we see him with his father.

So to see Enji with Touya when he was a baby, prior to his quirk manifesting, strikes me as a big deal. But it makes sense if you remember that he’d placed all his hopes, dreams and expectations on his firstborn. Initially, it doesn’t look like he even considered the possibility that Touya wouldn’t be his successor or that his little eugenics experiment would fail; this was his first, most optimistic attempt at a masterpiece. So I don’t believe it’s far-fetched to see him spend more time with Touya right off the bat (it’s what will make the eventual abandonment all the more crushing).

However, Rei isn’t seen at all in the snippet of Touya’s infancy, despite us knowing she was relegated to the caregiver role. Rei is literally out of the picture. Compare this to how she features prominently in Shouto’s infancy or how we see her holding a baby Natsuo. You could argue that, hey, we don’t see her holding a baby Fuyumi either, but there’s other scenes where Fuyumi’s attached to her mother’s hip or crying over her being hurt. Things that suggest a closeness, when the only scene we get of just her and Touya is one where they’re at odds. 

As we move further into Touya’s childhood, though, Rei becomes the only voice we hear advocate for him against his father. I’m referencing two specific instances:

When Enji coerces her into having more children to replace Touya now that his father has deemed him a failure, something she knows will hurt their son deeply.

And after Touya lashes out at Shouto, which Rei doesn’t blame on Touya, but rather on his father. She delivers such a satisfying condemnation of his actions, probably the most cutting one Endvr’s received to date, and it so accurately sums up one of his major character flaws.

How can you call yourself a hero when you can’t even face your own son?

The tragedy of it all is that Rei never said any of this in front of Touya -- it was always said in private, just to her husband. That alone took courage, yes, but it would’ve meant everything to Touya to hear her condemn his father aloud. Instead when she does speak to him, she says this:

It’s why I can’t wrap my head around that scene in Ch 302, where after Enji admits he didn’t know what to say to Touya, Rei replies, “Neither did I.” 

When we’re shown in flashbacks during that same chapter that she did understand her son. “He just wants to be acknowledged by you” is quite the indication that she, at the very least, understood the cause of Touya’s turmoil even if she couldn’t fully relate to it herself. So why can’t she say any of this to him?

The answer is in the way she addresses Touya, as it is nearly identical to how Nao addresses Tenko in this scene:

Both Touya and Tenko grew up in similar households: the father had all the power, physical and financial, so the mothers were left to try and comfort their children in a way that didn’t go against their husbands’ desires -- and so, to use Tenko’s own words, they would “reject them with kindness.”

So it’s no wonder that Touya lashes out at his mother after she suggests he pursue other things. He isn’t five like Tenko was, he’s thirteen and has a much clearer understanding of why she says this and why it’s a bit hypocritical, since he’s aware of her situation, too.

Just as she was bound by her family, who wanted her to marry Endvr for the money and status, he’s bound by the expectations of his family. I’m not sure if I’ve seen anyone else touch on this detail, but when Touya states that he knows his grandparents sold his mom into marriage so his dad could have a child, we could infer that Touya knows enough to realize that his mother might not have necessarily wanted him.

Not him specifically, but any child — the story has neglected to flesh her out beyond her marriage and motherhood, so we have no idea if Rei wanted to become a mother prior to this arrangement, despite how much she loves her kids now — although it is possible that he might’ve internalized it this way.

So you have Touya, who at least knows with certainty that his father wanted him to exist, yet he comes to understand that his father only wants him if he can meet a specific set of expectations, and if he cannot, he’ll be discarded. If he can’t surpass All Might, he can’t fulfill his reason for existing and his father will have to replace him. So to have his mother urge him to follow a path other than becoming a hero would mean, to Touya, accepting that he is the mistake he fears he is. Of course he isn’t going to respond well to that.

I don’t like when people try to compare Touya’s reaction in this moment to Shouto’s when Rei tells him he isn’t bound by his father’s blood, using that to paint Shouto as the “good” child and Touya as the “bad” one. They didn’t react differently because of any innate sense of goodness or lack thereof -- they reacted differently because the situations are different.

Telling Shouto that he didn’t have to be like his father comforted Shouto, who only knew his father as the bully who hurt his mom. He associated his father, and his father’s fire, with all of that fear and pain -- and thus, he associated the part of himself that took after his father with those feelings. She wasn’t denying his dream of becoming a hero, only assuring him that when he became a hero it could be whatever kind of hero he chose to be, that he wasn’t doomed to be like his father.

Whereas what she tells Touya sounds a lot like what his father told him, which was to give up on being a hero and pursue other aspirations.

Encouraging Shouto to become his own version of a hero still falls in line with what Endvr ultimately wants, which is for Shouto to be a hero capable of surpassing All Might. Whereas this is what happens when Touya continues to train to do that against his father’s wishes:

This is where the framing begins to bother me and where Rei’s characterization becomes inconsistent. 

So in this scene from Ch 302, we see Enji abusing his wife for “letting” Touya continue to train, punishing her for her “failure” to stop him. Obviously, none of that is Rei’s fault. If anything, Enji would be more responsible for preventing Touya from hurting himself since he’s the reason his son is hurting himself in the first place.

Moreover, the fact that he hits Rei over this sort of muddies the water of an previously-established narrative. Since the Sports Festival arc, we’ve known that Endvr abused his wife because she tried to interfere with Shouto’s training. It got to the point where she was terrified of her husband and it drove her to a breakdown. Why introduce this new aspect to the abuse, when it was already established that a) he was physically abusive and b) his motivations for abusing her were explicit to the audience? 

I’m not saying it doesn’t make sense that a man who hits his wife for one reason could find another reason to do it and justify his actions to himself. And while the scene does portray Endvr in a bad light to show how wrong his actions are, literally draping his figure in shadow, why does it even dare to suggest the idea that Rei was remiss in her duties as a mother? Again, the scene isn’t even necessary, since the narrative has long-since showed the audience that Enji abused his wife. 

By itself, the scene would read as further exploration of how Rei was victimized and how it affected her children. When you look at it with the chapter as a whole, though? Remember, this is the chapter where Rei claims that all of the family shares the blame in what happened to Touya, displacing some of the blame that rightfully rests on Enji. 

But my major gripe with this scene is how it reframes the sole moment we get of Rei and Touya alone. Because we know that Rei understands Touya, based on her confrontations with her husband in Ch 301 & 302. Rather than encourage him to be what he wants or acknowledge that his father is in the wrong, however, her advice falls in line with what Enji wants -- to stop Touya from training. And this comes after a scene where we see Enji beat his wife when she doesn’t stop Touya from training.

With all that in mind, it could potentially be read as Rei trying stop Touya for the sake of protecting herself and the family -- I don’t think it’s coincidence that in the scene where he hits her that we see Shouto, Fuyumi & Natsuo all as witnesses who are very distressed by what’s happening to their mother -- at the cost of Touya’s need to be validated. And if executed well or at least better than it has here, that wouldn’t be a bad choice of narrative per se, and it would fit into the pattern where the households the villains were raised in -- notably Shigaraki, Dabi & Toga -- mimic the society they live in, just on a smaller scale.

Except. Does that sort of narrative make sense based on what we already know about Rei?

Certainly, it is natural to want to protect yourself under physical and/or emotional duress by appeasing your abuser. This sort of complicated dynamic appears in the Shimura family, too. Just like in the house that Kotaro built, the Todoroki family revolves around the desires of the abuser and is dictated by his whims.

I would argue that Nao does give us a well-written example of this narrative. From the beginning, it’s established that she loves Tenko dearly. But in the house her husband built, there’s no room to love her son as he deserves. She prioritizes the feelings of Tenko’s father for the sake of maintaining peace in the household and this is established quickly and plainly.

Early on in the flashback, Kotaro exerts his control over the house, while Nao + her parents look uncomfortable. Despite this, we watch as they comply with his rules, all at the expense of Tenko’s feelings. When she stands up to Kotaro at last, it is not where Tenko can see and already too late. It’s a painful story, full of regret and sadness, but it is consistent from start to end. Nobody feels out-of-character or there to prop up anybody else.

So why doesn’t Rei feel as consistent in this narrative?

Because it doesn’t fit with everything we knew about Rei prior to her abuser’s subpar redemption arc.

The way she interacts with Touya would make sense, if this was how she was portrayed from the start. However, her behavior in Shouto’s flashback -- where she was first introduced -- contrasts what we get in the later Todoroki flashbacks.

Let’s compare this to the scenes in Ch 302. Here, Rei interferes on Shouto’s behalf. She advocates for her son in front of Shouto where he can hear. She stands up to his bully/villain and tries to protect him, while also validating his feelings in the process. Directly after this, Enji hits her, not for failing to comply with his demands, but for defying him. 

It is difficult to reconcile this Rei with the Rei we get in Ch 302. And if you try to find an in-story reason for the inconsistency, the options either do a disservice to Rei or make things even more painful for Touya. But I’m sure most of you have realized that I’m going to suggest a reason for this inconsistency that goes beyond the canon.

Because when Rei was first introduced in the story, Endvr was unequivocally the villain in the Todoroki family, not some misguided patriarch trying to atone for his “past” mistakes. Years later and in the midst of his redemption arc, the narrative seems to be intent on making this man more palatable to readers, and it’s used Rei at every opportunity to prop up his efforts to be better. Often, though, it takes some of the heat off Enji by displacing it onto other family members, most significantly Rei & Touya.

Like, you can literally see the difference in the frame from early in the manga to now:

Ch 39: Endvr trains his five-year-old to the point where he’s throwing up due overextension and being punched by a fully grown adult who is also his father. Rei tries to protect her son and gets slapped by Endvr. All the blames rests squarely on Endvr, who is clearly the aggressor and painted as the villain here.

Ch 302: Endvr hits Rei for not preventing Touya from sneaking out to train, knocking her to the ground. Again, Endvr is clearly the aggressor, but oh this time it’s not driven solely by his selfish desires it’s also cocnern for his son; Rei is the victim but oh she also should have been watching him more closely, and oh well why was Touya going out in the first place, when everyone has told him to stop and he knows his mom will get punished for it?

Honestly, I can understand where some people have mixed feelings over Rei’s character, particularly since the writing has done her such a disservice recently. With that being said, however, it takes a minimum amount of critical thinking to recognize that while you can criticize some choices she made, you cannot hold her to the same standard of accountability as Enji, it’s absurd. The power imbalance was obviously tipped in Endvr’s favor, always.

It is a shame, too, that we can’t have more discussions that don’t turn into some readers (a lot of whom are attempting to make Endvr sound less horrible than he actually was) trying to demonize her. It’s doubly a shame the story itself doesn’t bother to flesh her out as a person, instead using her as a prop, because the complex relationships she has with Touya -- with all her children, really -- has plenty of room for exploration. 

Like, there was no reason to add this new dimension of resentment due to her spouting Enji’s words back at Touya, when there was already a source of tension supported by previous canon -- the neglect the Todoroki kids suffered because Rei couldn’t be the parent they needed, due to her declining mental health and eventual breakdown.

Or, if you want to complicate their dynamic further, why not add something that focuses on Rei and has nothing to do with Enji? We learn in the flashbacks that Rei agreed to the marriage more-or-less to please her family, lamenting that she “intended to smile through it to the end,” essentially admitting that her hope was she could grin and bear it. It is telling that she had this attitude before entering her marriage; evidently, she was raised with the idea that she should be acquiescent to her parents’ whims and not express herself if she was only going to be contrary. Maybe she didn’t know how to deal with Touya’s very expressive, very emotional outbursts as a result. And her inability to respond would be the exact opposite of what Touya was seeking.

Not to mention that Touya died, and for the last decade, Rei was under the impression she had lost her son forever. He died while she was hospitalized, torn up with guilt over what she did to Shouto, only to find out that her other son died in a frankly horrific manner, and she could do nothing. By the time she would’ve found out, it was too late to even try to do anything. I can’t imagine what she must’ve felt in terms of regret alone, plus her grief. And I’m still mad we were robbed of her reaction to Touya being alive, because now suddenly there is a chance to do something, to change what was once written in stone.

Or what about Touya’s feelings for his mother, that have yet to be given much depth? As the oldest and most aware of his existence, it seems like he was the first to truly understand his mother’s situation and I can’t help but wonder: If Touya knew he vessel for his father’s ambition, and his mother was sold into role of creating/caring for him, did he question her love for him? Once he found out one parent’s love was conditional, it wouldn’t be a leap for him to consider it for the other. And yet if that’s true, Dabi doesn’t appear to hold any ill-will towards her for that. He was angry at her hypocrisy, because he knows she should understand, but her words to him didn’t reflect that.

All of that is fascinating and so much better than what we got in canon, so far at least. I’m hoping for them interact in the present at least once before the end of the series, and I think they will, but as to how satisfying a reconciliation it’ll be, I guess we’ll have to wait to see how the Todoroki plotline progresses from here on out.

[the-movie-ends-after-midsummer]

Charlie and Neil’s Friendship, pt. 2

“Dammit Neil. The name is Nuwanda.”

At this point in the movie, we’ve seen their relationship. We know that these two have an inseparable bond. They have a mutual understanding of each other. Neil is conflicted, though. Part of him knows how much Charlie is the type to say “screw you” to authority figures, but he also knows how harsh Nolan can be. I think part of him was worried that he would cave in, the way Neil always had when it came to his father.

I think this frame shows a big part of their relationship; Charlie is the person Neil always wants to be. Where Charlie is chaotic and carefree, Neil is careful and much less than chaotic.

In this scene, Charlie is telling the rest of the boys what Nolan did. Neil is sitting on the chair backwards (because he doesn’t know how to sit straight). As the scene goes on and we see Neil’s face, we see that his is quite possibly the most animated out of everyone. He’s comfortable here, he’s happy, and he’s listening to his best friend tell this story like it’s nothing.

Charlie may not know anything about theater, but he knows that his best friend is living out his dream. He’s known Neil for years; there’s no way he doesn’t know about Neil’s dream of acting. In this moment, he is filled with overwhelming pride. He doesn’t care if it’s not proper theater etiquette. He’s proud of Neil, and he wants the whole world to know that.

Charlie is shocked. He just watched Neil defy his father and pursue his dreams; they all did. Yet, here’s Neil, following his father once again like the play never happened.

This is the one part that always gets me. Because, out of all the Poets to tell Todd, it’s Charlie. When the camera flips to show Meeks, Pitts, and Knox, they don’t have tear tracks down the side of their faces. It also makes sense that he’s the one to tell Todd, because besides Todd, Charlie’s the closest to Neil. This is also one of the first times we see Charlie show emotions so strong. Sure, he was teary-eyed after Nolan, but that was more likely to be a physical reflex than anything else. This is true, raw emotion. He likely had a mental breakdown when he found out, and insisted on being the person to tell Todd.

He’s in denial. He’s in pain. As much as he wants it to be anyone else, he knows that it’s Neil they’re grieving. He knows that, if it was anyone else, Neil would be right there beside him. In his mind, he’s already shown too much emotion, so he shuts down instead of feeling his feelings. He shuts down because he feels obligated to be the strong one out of the group, especially since Neil died. He knows that, if he starts crying, he’s not going to be able to stop.

This is obviously pure anger. But, he’s not just angry at Cameron. He’s angry at himself. I should have stopped Mr. Perry that day. I should have gotten Neil away from his dad long before any of this. I should have-

In his mind, it’s all his fault. When he says “I’m out anyway,” he knows that Nolan is going to try and find someone to blame Neil’s death, so he’s volunteering himself as scapegoat. He doesn’t want anyone else to take the fall, so he’s placing himself on the chopping block.

He’s mad at Cameron because he’s terrified that Cameron is going to break up the group. He’s terrified that his best friends, his family are going to get blamed for something he feels responsible for.

When he finds out that they’re trying to blame Keating instead of the boys, Charlie’s anger grows, and he becomes angry at the administration.